I had the unexpected joy of introducing my widowed father to online dating three years ago, culminating in the ultimate success – he married her!
My parents had been married for over 50 years when my mother was diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumor. After two long years, she passed away and my dad had to learn how to live as a single man for the first time in his life. They both married right out of school (parents’ home to their own), so dad hadn’t the faintest idea how to be on his own – then in his early 70s.
Dad confided in me that, after a time of mourning, he was very lonely. He is outgoing, friendly, and has an easy charm about him. He tried a local match making service (where were you Matt Titus?!) for a number of months with no luck. Enter me, the Computer Cupid. Thinking dad would be hesitant to my suggestion, imagine my (pleasant) surprise when he willingly agreed to my registering him for online dating!
We bonded in a unique way during our time together, as I introduced him to the world of the internet. It was understood and agreed from the onset, that I was merely being his computer secretary, and everything I entered for him, was to be his words and emotions. I remembered his being very romantic with mom over the years. Flowers “just because,” building on their dreams together, and “thinking of you” cards he mailed to her (what a treat to find something other than a bill in the mail!) on a regular and ongoing basis. I just assumed that chivalrous quality had died when mom did.
But no. He waxed poetic, from his heart (with the occasional proper sentence structure from his wordsmith daughter, thank you very much), and it was my absolute joy to see this side of him and to help him express it. It felt like a modern-day version of a message in a bottle; a missive sent out into the vast unknown of the world-wide web in hopes of finding a new love. Sigh....who says love is only for the young!
After the sadness at losing my mother, fate dealt a winning hand to dad in his new lady, Edith. They connected online after just 3 months, began dating and never looked back. I couldn’t be more pleased with his choice, she is a lovely, Christian widower herself. NOT the stereotypical stepmother, that’s for sure.
During their courtship, I traveled extensively (employment related) on the east coast. I came home at Christmas (’06) and accepted a most serendipitous honor when dad asked me to help him choose Edith’s engagement ring; he was popping the question at Christmas! I found it rife with irony, that the store where he found the ring (large scale chain store with a beautiful jewelry department), was one that mom and I had been in so many times together. Shopping for other things, we often slowed down while passing the jewelry counter. And then, there I was, with dad, shopping for the new woman in his life. I was so proud to be a part of that moment.
They married a few months later, and I was, sadly, unable to return for the wedding (work-related issues).. It was a small ceremony, but filled with love, and nearby family and friends. I keep my cupid wings dusted off in hopes I may be a divining rod for another delightful couple. Imagine—you could do it too for someone you know – all it takes is a little time and a giving spirit – and a disclaimer if the match doesn’t work! {wink}
