The date went well, at least according to you. But, now you haven’t had a call from Mr. Right Now since that steamy kiss goodnight. What gives? Relationship Guru Matt Titus has a few pointers to make sure you don’t ever wait by the phone again. If Mr. McSteamy doesn’t call here are some of the possible reasons for his “silent treatment.”
1. You Are Not His Priority
I believe this is due to what I have coined as “The Totem Pole Theory.” All men have a subconscious totem pole that dictates what they will give their attention to at any given time. Usual priorities upon first date {his career, his friends, the girl he is currently sleeping with, his dog and you}
2. Because He IS Into You
This guy is easy to read. He had a great time on the date, it was very clear and he is putting the so-called three day rule into practice. This rule applies more to a man you have gone out with rather than one who has simple taken your number.
3. To Him A Call = Commitment
As a woman you are only looking for a second date in a phone call, but for a man, that call often means he is getting himself further obligated to seeing you. Calling, texting and even emailing means more to him than it may to you. When a man sees you as a potential future partner he is less apt to call right away. In this case, you must be patient, do not panic and do not call.
4. He Has Man-Child Syndrome
This man is a sixteen year old trapped in the body of a fourty one year old man, therefore his dating behavior is that of a teenager. Lack of maturity makes him uncomfortable to call, get close too fast. They treat women more like friends. You must be the adult and show this is unacceptable. If you accept this behavior it will never change and he will never call.
5. He Is A Confirmed Bachelor
A confirmed bachelor is different from a player. They have similar characteristics but this man doesn’t pretend. He lets the woman know she will have a great time with him, but that there is no hope for a future together of settling down. While he talks about the future, he is very careful never to use the word we, rather he stresses the word I. He will not call within a week of the first date and the most skilled confirmed bachelor will give it 10 days. He knows if he calls back earlier, more than just casual dating could be expected of him.
Now, there are a few ways to make sure your voicemail is always full. Take a look.
How To Make Sure He Does Call
Whether you have a confirmed bachelor on your hands or a man who is crazy about you, there are some first date do’s and dates to ensure your phone will be ringing for date #2:
1. Don’t Touch That Dial
2. Do Leave It At The Door
3. Don’t Sleep With Him
4. Two Drink Limit
5. Topics / Don’t Discuss: sex, marriage, kids
What if he still won’t? Now What?
1. Do not talk about him or try to analyze what went wrong, and do NOT wait for more than 10 days.
2. Accept that his not calling his nothing to do with you
3. Go out on another date as quickly as possible
4. Fall in love with yourself (be selfish, go get a facial, workout, shop! and quit spending your hours worrying about him)
5. Add up the hours you have just wasted obsessing over his and spend the same amount of time working out…nothing can boost your confidence like feeling great about yourself.
3 Comments
Any advice on excuses not to sleep with a man when you want to? You know that when you say “no”, he will ask “why"…
I found this blog on a google search and boy am I glad I did. I thought I heard someone mention it in a free chat room.
Awesome read!
Gosh, I wish I knew all of this 20 years ago!!!!!